What Home Really Looks Like
Photo by Itamar Dotan Katz
Dear friends,
One week ago, there were one million less refugees in the world. One week of war creates homelessness on that vast a scale.
I grew up with the presence of war. Every few years since I was five, my country of refugees would try and stop the nation of refugees we created when we started our country from attacking it, by making many of them refugees a second or third time. The refugee heart of the Jewish state made and makes it cling to its home with everything it’s got and anything it can get. The stateless, status-less Palestinians, who still carry the keys to their ancestral homes as the living symbol of their homelessness, need to claw their way back home, no matter how. Two nations living and reliving their homelessness. This was my home. My experience tells me that the million new refugees and the millions yet to come will develop a new mentality and pass it down for generations.
Hannah Arendt described what it’s like to be a refugee in We Refugees:
"We lost our home, which means the familiarity of daily life. We lost our occupation, which means the confidence that we are of some use in this world. We lost our language, which means the naturalness of reactions, the simplicity of gestures, the unaffected expression of feelings. We left our relatives in the Polish ghettoes and our best friends have been killed in concentration camps, and that means the rupture of our private lives. "
There is a mentality to the experience of needing refuge that is unique. This week, students in our Hebrew school interviewed their parents and grandparents about their family’s immigration story. I overheard Ezzy interviewing his grandfather Roby. Kicked out of Egypt in 1957 for being Jews, Roby and his parents ended up in Paris for a few years before moving to Italy, Israel and finally Canada. When Ezzy asked him how these experiences impacted his view of life, Roby described the decades that followed them, of never feeling at home. He always felt like a guest, even in his own house.
As Jews, we all have these experiences in our DNA. Most of us still carry the memory of being forced to flee. It’s hard to think of biblical characters who weren’t refugees. From Adam and Eve all the way to the end of the Torah almost every single one sought refuge. We carry a homesickness, an estrangement we can’t quite place or explain. My father-in-law's sense of being a guest doesn’t sound foreign to many of us.
Arendt continues:
"We were told to forget; and we forgot quicker than anybody ever could imagine. In a friendly way we were reminded that the new country would become a new home; and after four weeks in France or six weeks in America, we pretended to be Frenchman or Americans. The more optimistic among us would even add that their whole former life had been passed in a kind of unconscious exile and only their new country now taught them what a home really looks like."
The refugee in us lives in exile, whether consciously or not. “What a home really looks like” is one of the great questions of our lives.
One of the reasons I think this last week has been so painful to many of us, is because Ukraine plays a role in our story of what a home looks like. Many of our families lived there for generations. Two of the greatest positive pieces of contemporary Jewish identity were formed on the land now called Ukraine. Two different historical movements there, one in the 18th century (Hassidism) and the other in the late 19th century (The revival of the Hebrew language) – both stamped with the reality of anti-Jewish acts and the refugee mindset that those acts bring – created important foundations of true pride for Jewish people to this day. These pieces of our sense of home in the world are what I would like to explore with you this evening at our special Shabbat at the 14th Street Y. I am excited to connect, through music, story and conversation with these two historical movements that blossomed in Ukraine. I’m excited to feel the unity of Jews all over the US marking HIAS Refugee Shabbat. I’m looking forward to sending prayers and love toward Ukraine. I’m excited to introduce you all to a wonderful singer, Dana Herz. I’m excited to be IN PERSON with y’all again and come back home to Shabbat.
Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Misha